Painkiller: Battle Out of Hell | C6L5 Underworld - Ordeal, All Secrets

This level has it all:
-An autoscroller section where you can't move and are forced to take unavoidable damage
-Bumpy and buggy terrain geometry on which both the player and the enemies get stuck on
-Ugly visuals consisting mostly of brown, diarrhea-like rock textures
-Increased chance of crashing because of all the stuff that's going on
-Extremely precise parkour secrets, which only become accessible after finishing the level, requiring you to backtrack through almost the entire map
-Water that sometimes kills you, sometimes doesn't, and there's no visual difference between them
-An "exciting" enemy roster, which consists of:

*Yellow Pirates, who are incredibly fast melee enemies that will run you down tight corridors
*Red Pirates, who are hitscanners that will snipe you from the other end of the map and can also throw grenades which can hit you through walls, it also has holes in it's enemy model through which your projectiles can pass
*Purple Pirates, also hitscanners with grenades, but are faster than the red ones
*Red Bossmen who fire 2 PHYSICS BASED grenades that randomly bounce around
*Yellow Bossmen who fire INVISIBLE ROCKETS, that's right, INVISIBLE FUCKING ROCKETS
*Voodo Priests that have high damage hitscan attack that you cannot avoid

And if that wasn't enough, Ordeal makes this level EVEN WORSE by adding the worst secret ever created by a human being. It's right at the end of the level and it requires you to make a 180° turn immediately after jumping on a bouncer, landing on hanging vines, jumping on a small ledge and wall gliding to a burning pentagram to make a holy item spawn. Did I mention that this secret is on A FUCKING TIME LIMIT? You need to do this all while under the effect of a powerup item, if it runs out, you can not get this secret anymore.

This is one of the worst levels in FPS history. It's right up there with A Breakfast in France/One For The Road from SS4, The Library from Halo, and any level from PK: Resurrection. Pure fucking shit.

I was going to use quicksaves to get that timed secret, but I somehow managed to get it on my 3rd jump. This was my luckiest run in general, I finished the autoscroller section with the most health and armor out of any run I've had. I could've used that luck to win a lottery, or drop a Mirror of Kalandra in PoE, but I had to waste it on an awful Painkiller level, what a waste.

Secrets:
0:00 Start
2:23 Secret 1
2:33 Secret 2
10:17 Game Crash
13:46 Powerup for the secret
14:10 Secret 3
14:29 Bactracking for secrets
15:02 Secret 4
15:56 Secret 5
16:07 Secret 6
16:18 Secret 7
17:08 Secret 8
17:25 Secret 9
18:04 Secret 10
18:41 Secret 11
19:00 Secret 12
19:42 Secret 13
19:57 The Way Back